Another bad day. Almost 3:00 PM and I have hardly done anything. I did reach out to some people and got some closure on some things. I managed to potentially procure a tablesaw to pick up tomorrow. For a project I am starting. I still just want to give up. So very much! I cried quite a bit today. I’d like to go to sleep and never wake up, but here I am until March 8th, 2020. I am trying to take it moment by moment and not hate myself too much, even though I do. I see the MD next Monday.  A new one. I don’t hold out much hope, but perhaps she can refer me to a new therapist. My current therapist sees me off my insurance, so I can see another one. Who knows, perhaps two therapists is the answer? This evening I am going to work in the garage and post items online to sell, then I will have the money I need to buy the remainder of the supplies to begin my project. It is keeping me going to some extent. I think if I wasn’t depressed I would enjoy living. That makes me sad. Everything makes me sad.

 

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