*I am not a doctor or any type of medical professional. I do not recommend modalities of any type, I am only presenting what I have tried and what has and hasn’t worked for me.*

I was first diagnosed with depression at the age of 20, though it began at 12 years of age when I went through puberty.

The first medication I was prescribed was Paxil. It worked fairly quickly. I felt outgoing and positive again for a few months. When it stopped working the doctors prescribed Prozac. It worked as well, however I develop neck and shoulder pain/tightness that was debilitating. I stopped taking it because of this.

From there it was a merry-go-round of medication trials. I was on and off Wellbutrin for 12 years. It kept me from becoming suicidal, but I was irritable and had difficulty with impulse control.

During the times the Wellbutrin wasn’t working or I was not taking it, the doctors prescribed a myriad of other medications. Prescriptions for antidepressants, mood stabilizers, anti-psychotics, etc… I feel like I tried just about everything out there. They either didn’t work or I could not tolerate the side effects.

I saw several naturopaths as well over the years. I tired St. John’s Wort, 5-HTP, Lithium Orotate, Magnesium, Rhodiola, Viamin-D, Fish Oil, L-theanine, Reishi mushroom, Cats Claw, a daily multi-vitamin, and many more. They all worked to some degree, but the depression, the suicidal ideation, the impulse control issues, and the anxiety was never fully kept at bay.

I have also worked with plant medicines to include, Ayahuasca, San Pedro, Cannabis, and Kratom. I feel they have had the greatest positive impact on my life and I see future ceremonies in my future.

In my recovery I have also participated in retreats (both plant medicine and meditation retreats), healing through time in mother nature, exercise: gym and kickboxing and trampolining for 3 months at our local indoor trampoline park (it’s quite a workout), therapy, support groups, a healthy whole-foods diet (I’ve been a vegetarian for 11 years), positive thinking, mindfulness, yoga, sound healing, epigenetics work, etc…

It’s been a journey through hell, but I can genuinely say I have come out on the other side and there is hope. It can get better! Please don’t give up! When I began this blog I honestly did not believe I would still be alive today and I definitely did not believe I could want to be alive. It’s worth it! It really truly is! Hang on and keep trying. I’m always here to help.